Dear Robert,

It’s December 28, Wednesday, and it looks as if you are finally on your way back to me after being off to visit your family during yet another Christmas holiday. I know you’ve said we’d get to spend some time together this go-round, but with Breaking Dawn promotion, and then having to keep up with that Summit-mandated shill of a fauxmance with the famewhore clinger, I have to admit I’ve been feeling a bit neglected as of late. Well, for the past three years anyways.

You promised me once Breaking Dawn filming was over, it would finally be our time to come out as a couple. After all, there’s not many secret girlfriends that will sit and wait patiently on the sidelines (more like down in the basement) while having to watch their boyfriend pine away publicly for some bitch who can hardly put two sentences together in front of the media. In fact, really, I am starting to feel a tad irritated. Here we have been, secretly together as boyfriend and girlfriend for nearly four years now, with a PROMISED commitment, yet you still manage to spend more time with “her.”

What does she have that I do not? Fame? Money? Taste in music? I told you I wouldn’t make you go to the Backstreet Boys / New Kids reunion tour if you didn’t want to, even if I could get the VIP/Backstage passes so you wouldn’t be seen.

According to so many, I am your ideal. Tall, blonde, and of course, so quiet about our relationship that even you seem to forget that I exist sometimes. I mean, really, you could have least sent me a card for Christmas, or is all of that luggage you are bringing home with you from London filled to the brim with sweet pressies for me from Harrods and other lovely London shops? After all, I spent loads of time on Rodeo Drive finding just the right designer presents to wrap and give to you under our tree. You know, the tree I decorated ALONE, after I had to watch you go off to London again ALONE after you’d already spent several weeks with her – living in the same apartment even -- to spend time with your family in London, who you’ve never even bothered introducing me to.

Heck, even miss “clinger” has met your parents on several occasions. And your sisters, and all of your friends, and even appeared in one friend’s music video. I’ve not even seen them. Is that what true love is? Hiding behind the scenes for year after year after year while having to watch your boyfriend take so much time to spend with another woman that he is supposed to hate because some decomposing Orc-born trolls don’t approve of her? What about ME??? You know, your SECRET GIRLFRIEND? They approve of ME, so shouldn’t I get the spotlight more? After all, I meet their criteria as the perfect girlfriend (tall, blonde and my name doesn’t rhyme with Tristen Blewart.) Oh, and I’ve been patiently waiting for you to finally recognize our relationship for MORE THAN THREE YEARS.

And it’s not just spending time with “her” on set that bothers me, or the kissing, or the on-screen cuddling, or the acting like you are in love and there is no one else in the world but this woman. I mean, you don’t even look at me in REAL LIFE the way you look at her on camera. And when you look at “her” off camera, it’s as if you are really IN LOVE with her as a person, and not just her character. And when you visit her on sets in other locations, and then she comes to visit you, and you spend both of your birthdays together (which I’ve NEVER gotten to do), and you spend most, if not ALL, of your non-set time with her, unless she is working, and she attends your movie premieres, and holds your hand in public, and holds your hand in the car and kisses and hugs you… when is it MY TURN? You know, ME – your secret girlfriend?
Can’t a girl catch a break? After so many years of pining away for you in our secret LA-based enclave, hoping beyond hope that I don’t have to open the tabloids and see another photo of you out with that girl, even if you weren’t smiling for the cameras or holding hands in public (wait, I thought this was for PR), don’t you think I deserve some small amount of attention? I mean, a wink from an awards show podium, or even some small acknowledgment that I exist????
I mean, really. I know you made that “she’s in LA” remark when asked where your girlfriend was, and you told that other reporter “that’s so ridiculous” when he asked if you could start calling “her” your girl now, but what about a nod in my direction? Why can’t you just say “My girlfriend is blonde,” or something like that, just to finally and absolutely give everyone PROOF that you were talking about me!

So, please. Now that I know you are on your way back…

HOLD ON. I just got a text from you…

@#($&@#%^^)^&@)&%&^!!!!!!!!!!

Wait a second!!! What do you mean you’re spending your New Year’s with HER!!!!???? You PROMISED!!! This was to be OUR YEAR, OUR TIME to finally come out as a couple TOGETHER!!!

But now you text and tell me that Summit is requiring you to hold on to your “other promotional considerations” clause and go out with HER so you can satisfy those bottom-trolling  R’sten FANS????!!!!

Haven’t you cashed that paycheck already? Don’t I DESERVE some time now? Or, at least a little compensation for all of my patience and understanding. How long do you expect me to sit here and wait for all of this BS to be over? One more year, two years, more? It’s been THREE years already. I want to get married and have children (I mean, you said you wanted that, too), so when are you going to give up that clinger and acknowledge me?!!!!!

I’ve waited enough. And if you don’t do it soon, I certainly will. I may even plan some big pap drama just to stir the pot. Of course, the paps don’t know who I am, or what my name is, or that I even exist, and really if anyone knows ANYTHING in L.A., it’s the paps and gossip columns. That’s it! Maybe I’ll just sell my story to Ted, or go on the radio with Ryan Seacrest, or tell somebody SOMETHING, because THIS IS L.A. and secrets always end up in the media in L.A. – even if they really are “secrets.”

Until then, enjoy the clinger. I’ll still be waiting for you next year, after Breaking Dawn 2 promo is over, when we can finally, and I do mean FINALLY, come out officially as a couple.

Love,
Your ever-patient, figment of the ninnies imagination, secret BLONDE girlfriend.

P.S. Oh, and don’t bother with the Cosmopolis or Bel Ami premiere invitation. You know I won’t go anyway.

The X Factor

There are some days here at BWAN central when we really have to sit back and give pause before thinking about exactly how we want to start a post. We hem, we haw, we discuss amongst ourselves. Basically, we try to decide the best way to approach a specific topic, especially one we know will likely incite riots within the fandom.

But hey, sometimes you just gotta put it out there, so here goes: Nikki Reed.

We’ve come out VERY strongly in our tweets to state that we do not condone any fan tweeting to her and calling her a bitch, cunt or other unsavory name. It’s rude, period, especially if those words are directed at her by people who we know demand Kristen be treated with respect. Besides, we’d rather save those choice words for our favorite ninny friends.

But here we are at a crossroads again, which is how to approach this topic without sending everyone into a rabid foamfest.

We’ll admit from the get-go that as a group we’re split on the Nikki factor. Some of us would rather see her banned to Famewhore Island where she can self-tan among the Paris Hiltons and Kim Kardashians of the world. Others recognize that she’s a talented actress, is pretty, but has issues with keeping her mouth shut at inappropriate moments. One thing we all agree upon is that she is at times a dangerous manipulator who has used the media to stir the pot and add drama where drama needs to be let go.

We all wish she wouldn’t work so hard in trying to keep herself “relevant” in front of the cameras. There is a difference between coming in and doing your job professionally and succinctly, and coming in and pushing your very obvious agenda onto the world, at the detriment to the larger issues at hand. This second act is what Nikki excels at, and in our eyes, it comes off as a cheap and desperate attempt at validity.

Ninnies refuse to see Nikki’s desperate grasps for relevancy since they are so focused on hating Kristen, and champion her because she is often vilified by Rob and Kristen supporters. Many (but not all) Rob and Kristen supporters see Nikki as the tramp who got in the way, even though as far as we are concerned, she really wasn’t in the way to begin with (at least not emotionally). That’s not to say she didn’t create drama in years past, but we’ll leave those details in the past, since: a) they are not worth rehashing here; and b) no one -- and we mean NO ONE -- except for 4 or 5 people, knows specifically what happened.

We won’t even delve into the Rob-Nikki “did they-didn’t they” argument, but it is obvious to us that “something” of one nature or another did occur, and certain expectations went unfulfilled. Otherwise, what impetus would Nikki have  – THREE YEARS LATER – to squawk about how things had gone so terribly wrong among the cast? Endlessly. Ever hear of a woman scorned? We thought so.

Ninnies are convinced that every time Nikki is brought back into fandom drama, it has to do with PAST ACTIONS. Where they fail - AGAIN - is that the issue at hand has nothing to do with fans’ dragging up the past, but with NIKKI herself dragging up the past time and time and time again.

We’ve seen the ninnies’ take on this tale, and as usual, they end up contorting the issue to such an extent where they end up making Rob look like an ass - yet they still want to be fans of his? Classic ninny logic fail.

They also claim that poor widdle Nikki is the victim in this whole scenario. And you know what we say? Damn, right, Nikkie’s the victim - a victim of HER OWN DEVICES.

Whatever occurred in the past, Nikki REFUSES TO LET GO OF IT. She is the ultimate Stage 5 Clinger. Even after finding her own happiness with new projects and a new marriage, she continues to sell the “I was so poor and mistreated” story, moaning about how she and the other cast mates are no longer close, how things have shifted, positioning herself as the victim on some grand scheme by a movie studio that failed to make her the star she wants to be. 

Why else, if she weren’t so bitter, would she continue to bemoan the fact that the cast is no longer as close as it once was? And why else, if she felt that she hadn’t in some way been wronged, would she feel so strongly motivated to turn every appearance she has made promoting Breaking Dawn into the “Nikki Reed” story? These aren’t opinions, they are verifiable facts.

Most people in a professional capacity understand that focusing on the present, and not the purported sins of the past , is what gets you ahead. Keep your head down, work hard, and reap the rewards. Nikki works hard alright, but as a master manipulator, selling herself above all else.

Going to the MTV Movie Awards? Let’s throw in an engagement announcement on the red carpet instead of being there to support our fellow cast members and the film we were paid to promote. 

Attending the worldwide premiere for the major movie in which you were a featured cast member? Let’s use THAT very day to release a love song you co-wrote with your husband, one which several media outlets claimed was featured on the movie’s very soundtrack. Oops! Now, just how did that happen? We’re sure it’s just coincidence, right ninnies?

Feel the need to bring attention to yourself since you weren’t treated the same and given equal financial footing by the studio you abhor? Let’s spill our sob story to multiple media outlets, including writing what can easily be construed as a “the Rob that got away” piece of crap fiction in Seventeen Magazine.

And of course we can’t forget the passive aggressive jibes at other cast members, or not one, but two very obvious attempts to run interference during Rob’s own media time on the red carpet. Yes, Nikki, your agenda is very much showing.

Many fans believe that Nikki has been and continues to be a source for gossip blogs and columnists. With no proof to back up our assertions, we at BWAN aren’t going to speculate on that, but we do find it coincidental that the same person who is and has been known for calling the paps for convenient photo opps wouldn’t also use the media to her advantage by turning herself into some victim in a grand Summit plot (sound familiar?), and drag Robert and Kristen right along with her.

And we agree. Nikki is a victim, but not one of Summit’s design. She is a victim the duplicitous actions that have caused her to be more or less shunned by the rest of the cast, as was very clearly evidenced by her behavior - and that of other Breaking Dawn cast members - on the recent Ellen Show.

Behind the laughs, smiles and painfully-awkward grape throwing there remained a tenuous veil of tension directed toward and around Nikki. Nothing was more telling then at the end of the telecast when the other cast members were dancing and giggling amongst themselves, Nikki was standing off on her own, quite literally on the outside looking in.

So tell us how poor Nikki is the victim in all of this, because quite frankly, we can’t and don’t see it. And that’s not rehashing that past, that is pointing out what is clearly going on in the present.

We hope that Nikki reads this. We really do. We hope it gives her the impetus to examine her behavior over the past weeks, and as she and moves on with her new marriage, new life and new professional projects, she can let go of whatever bitterness she harbors and learn that in life you sometimes reap what you sow. Perhaps it’s time she sowed her seeds and went on her way.

The One Where We Put It to Rest (Well, At Least One of Them)

Remember as a child when you would see something that sparked your interest and you just had to know everything about it? That’s something that as adults we never really grow out of.  In fact, with time, we become better at it. Our attention spans expand and we are more driven than ever to REALLY understand it.

That is how we’ve felt about CandyKizzes24. She’s been an enigma to us, a conundrum of sorts, mostly because she represents a particular brand of special we’ve yet to encounter in any other part of life. Where else but online do you come across someone so obsessed with an actor that they would willingly put their own reputations at stake and risk libel suits in order to besmirch and demean the very person he is in a relationship with.

As people, this fascinates us. As individuals who work in areas where human behaviour and response is an inherent part of what we do for a living, well, we’re right perplexed.

Our fascination with her has never been because we felt she spoke any sort of truth. We’ve known her to be a pathological liar from the get-go. What’s held our attention is the fact that as time has gone on, her lies and actions have only become louder and more extreme. It doesn’t matter that countless people have called her out on her words and have thus disproved her. It doesn’t matter that time and time again people have provided verifiable PROOF that has completely countered her perfidious claims. Nothing matters to her. Not integrity, not the harm she tries to inflict upon others, and certainly not honesty.

She is a seriously misguided individual who cannot control her inability to tell the truth, a classic narcissist with psychotic tendencies that has been given far too much credence in the realm of this fandom.

What sad kind of existence she must live to make up extremely vile and outlandish claims about people she has never met (and no, don’t come at us with that poor excuse for a manip from 2009). The cherry on top? The people she claims as friends? Even they have finally seen the error of their ways and have abandoned her, throwing her to her own devices and claiming they don’t want anything to do with her, nor do they want her representing them. That is the lowest of the low for anyone.

Sad they couldn’t see her for what she is so many years ago. Even more sad it took them so long to do so. Kind of speaks to their intelligence, don’t you think?

So as we find ourselves reflecting on our childhoods today, we can’t help but think of that integral moment when that favorite toy you’ve been playing with suddenly becomes completely uninteresting and you toss it to the side. We feel that for you, CK.

We are bored. The things you say aren’t worth speaking of because as of now, we are CERTAIN that not one person actually believes the shit you spew. So with the New Year in a month’s time, we are doing a cleansing. Oh we’re certain that you will stomp your feet and flail like a petulant 6 year old boy who isn’t getting that bike for Christmas when you realize that no one is paying you any mind. We’re sure that you will use that time to think up more ridiculous lies. Just as we’re sure no one will believe them. After all, if there is one thing you excel at it is terminological inexactitudes.

Gimmie Gimme More...

The fandom has been extra riled up over the past 48 hours or so, and all because of one simple thing: the lack of a direct confirmation from Rob or Kristen over the status of their relationship. Notice we said direct. Those with eyes, ears and even a modicum of common sense know very well the relationship has been confirmed and time again over the past two+ years, but in subtle, indirect ways.

Fans on all sides of the equation are using the lack of direct confirmation as vehicle with which to accuse Robert and Kristen (namely Robert) of a multitude of sins.

Ninnies use it as absolute PROOF that Robert and Kristen are not together. (We’re not going to go into the multiple and ridiculous ways they are wrong about “The Insider” video from Monday night).  They ignore every piece of evidence set before them, refusing to accept anything but word from Rob himself. Not that it would make a difference. The ongoing hatred toward Kristen would continue regardless whether Rob were to remain quiet, or smack it all up and make some grand gesture with a much-anticipated kiss during the next MTV Movie Awards (not gonna happen, folks). 

Krisbians, on the other hand, use it as a means to vilify Rob and prove that he is not worthy of Kristen because he has not declared himself publicly. Some Kristen supporters even go so far as to say that the hatred riled up by the nonnies would finally be put to an end if Rob were to confirm things, and that this makes him a bad boyfriend (we do have to give them half a point for acknowledging the fact that he IS the boyfriend). These fans also believe he should come out and directly chastise the Nonstens for the way they act towards Kristen and the malicious things they say about her.

What neither side wishes to acknowledge is that Robert and Kristen are adults, capable of making their own decisions about their private lives. That the two have chosen to keep things quiet is a bone of contention. These extremist fans believe that Robert and Kristen owe them an explanation. They push for answers as if it is their right to have one. (“Whyyyy don’t they just say it,” they cry. “He MUST be embarrassed by her, otherwise he’d admit it.”) And when small nuggets are dropped (“my boyfriend is English”), some automatically jump on their soap boxes, calling Kristen a famewhore and accusing both of playing  a manipulative game with the media and fans (the fact that both have acknowledged the “game” aspect of it doesn’t help things.)

They don’t trust that Robert and Kristen know what is best for themselves and each other (you really think they’ve not discussed it?), and stand firmly rooted in the belief that they should be privy to something Rob and Kristen time and again have proclaimed to be a private matter. To these fans, it doesn’t matter what Robert and Kristen want, which is simply to keep what is theirs, theirs. 

Instead of enjoying that which Robert and Kristen do choose to give, they see a confirmation as a panacea to all of their woes, fandom or no.

If ninnies get their answer, will they go quietly and find another actor to crush on? No. If Krisbians get their answer and have Rob call out the nonstens for their hatred towards Kristen, will those nonstens leave ship, or even those Krisbians for that matter? No again. A few people may jump off the fanwagon, but in general, these people’s behaviors won’t change a lick.


It’s been pretty well documented that the behaviors exhibited, particularly by the nonstens, constitute a psychological addiction. Nothing else can explain their excessive need to decry any and everything Kristen says, does, wears, eats, or acts in as wrong. And having Rob tell these fans to fuck off isn’t going to help. It’s going to hurt - both of them.

What world would we be living in if Rob, or Kristen, for that matter, were to make personal decisions based upon the desire of their fans? We don’t own them, nor control them. The best fans are admirers from afar, and don’t make any attempt to intervene with their professional or personal lives. 

Social media, including Twitter, has changed the game completely. Now large companies, including talent agencies, are quick to bring in interns and other marketing staff whose sole job is to scour the Internet daily for social hits about their clients. This includes Twitter, IMDB and other gossip site message boards, as well as comment boards on general news websites where news about a client or company is posted. To say they are aware of the good – and the bad (oh they are aware of the bad) – is an understatement of “Twilight”-level proportions.

But the fact that social media also plays a large role in the “Twilight” fandom is another reason Rob and Kristen choose to keep things private. They recognize very fully that their attachment was formed while they were playing Edward and Bella, and while the two wish to separate that from themselves, some members of the fandom do not see it that way.

As much as social media has given their teams these instantaneous “Q-ratings” on their actors, it has stripped away any modicum of privacy Rob and Kristen enjoy outside the confines of their home base. It’s well-known they go extreme measures to avoid being papped, and both actors have spoken publicly of the evils of twitter and other social media, noting how it has invaded their privacy in ways unimaginable.

We’d like to think that had Robert and Kristen met under different circumstances, a non-saga film, or just via casual acquaintance, that there wouldn’t be a need for these measures to be taken at all; that they would be able to more happily enjoy their careers and their privacy simultaneously. But then would their careers be where they are now? Hard to speculate.

Where most fans fail when it comes to Robert and Kristen is they are unwilling (or unable) to put themselves into their situation. The standards by which these fans judge the two are of their own experiences of private citizens. Were any of these fans to know, in even the smallest way, what it was like to live a life with so much public scrutiny, some would surely change their tune. It’s easy to judge others who live in glass houses when yours is made of brick and mortar. While thanks to “Twilight,” Robert and Kristen may be able to enjoy first-class tickets, fine meals and expensive cars, they’ve had give up those basic freedoms that we fans take for granted each and every day. A walk in the park, to go shopping in the mall, to go out on a regular date, or to a pub with friends. Even purchasing a home is not without its risks.

Robert and Kristen are simple people who came from normal, middle-class backgrounds. Their riches, while advantageous, mean very little to either of them. They still wear the same ratty jeans, plaid shirts and travel worn t-shirts we’ve seen them in for the past four years. In this regard, they have not changed (nor will they, by all accounts). They also have the same friends they’ve had for years.

Is it so hard, then, to make the leap by saying they want that same simplicity for their relationship, without outside pressures and fan drama? Just be a boy and a girl who happened to fall in love on the workplace, and who work hard to  keep things going despite the types of outside influences you and I will never know?

So why continue to place demands on them? Does it help them? Help you? Help the fandom? No.

Sit back, enjoy the “gems” they give us, and stop worrying about all this “will-they, won’t-they?” Because when you do, and you see things as they are, simply, without any bias, or expectation, it becomes so obvious. And all that other stuff? Well, that’s ridiculous.

Monday Morning Stupid

Seems like our dear ninnie friends have been playing “out of context” again. You know, the game where they selectively pull out a portion of a quote, only to turn it to mean something it’s not? This quote has been tweeted and tumbled and bumbled and sent out as a new rally cry, that in the ninnies’ myopic eyes, screams “See!!! Proof!!! They’re not together!”

The quote in reference is by none other than Billy Burke, who as Twilight fans know, plays the role of Bella’s father Charlie in the Twilight series.

Here’s the quote as the ninnies have been tumblring:

“There’s a lot of conjecture and things people would love to believe be because that’s what people do. That’s the weird, strange thing about this business. People look at people on a movie screen or in an interview and they develop ideas and opinions that probably most of the time are not anywhere near true.”

Wow! Quite telling, no? And vague, right? Pulling out these sentences, and he could mean anything, especially in the minds of the ninnies’ where they automatically contort these words to mean that Billy is talking about Kristen’s relationship with Rob, and therein disproving it.

But, in their haste to spin the truth, the ninnies forgot the most important thing of all: context.

Let’s take a look at the quote, IN ITS ENTIRETY.

“Um. I’m not sure that there are things that people know about her.  There’s a lot of conjecture and things people would love to believe because that’s what people do. That’s the weird, strange thing about this business. People look at people on a movie screen or in an interview and they develop ideas and opinions that probably most of the time are not anywhere near true. So I guess the first thing that comes to mind is that she’s probably way more misunderstood than people would imagine. And she’s such a genuine human being, and seems to be very true to herself. I really admire that about her.”

Nowhere in this quote was Billy talking about Kristen’s relationship with Rob. He wasn’t disproving a thing about that, nor even talking about their private life. He was instead pointing out how Kristen herself is misunderstood as a person because of how she is often portrayed via the media, and how the labels people cast onto her are not at all like she is in real life, someone that Billy calls “a genuine human being.”

Given that, we have to wonder why the ninnies would use this quote at all. It’s not within their realm to even think about posting something that could be construed as half-way complimentary.

Not to mention that it completely goes against that good old PRomance theory they've worked so hard to make relevant. 

Really, ninnies. And to think YOU think you are all the smart ones.

NListed: A Redux

Remember when we did a post on “The List?” You know, the encyclopedic tome of media outlets, celebrities and other folk who the ninnies can’t stand because they deign to compliment Kristen? Well, Ann Curry, step on up.

Seems her reference to Rob’s “beautiful girlfriend” caused quite the little stir in ninnieland.

Now, we’ll admit to being a huge fan of Ms. Curry’s. HUGE. We think she’s one of the classiest gals in broadcast television (Diane Sawyer is our favorite). But we’re also ready to admit that Ann is much better at general human interest or world news coverage than she is in entertainment reporting.

That being said, the ninnies are certain, CERTAIN, that Ms. Curry got a big ‘ole fat Summit paycheck to make her end-of-interview comment about Rob’s “beautiful girlfriend.”

We thought she handled the moment with great aplomb, and while it was a bit awkward and rushed (likely due to some producer giving her the “wrap it up” signal off-camera), it’s obvious to us, and to everyone who has even an iota of common sense, that the proverbial cat is out of the bag.  

So, while we had a few moments to while away the time before doing such important household tasks as dusting our Robert Pattinson commemorative plate collection, or vacuuming our hand-loomed Edward Cullen rug (we are all desperate housewives, afterall – at least according to the ninnies), we thought we’d put together a quick compendium of people and media outlets that are ninny-approved, and compare it to the list that gets their porcine tails all twisted and bent out of shape.

Hey, at least the ninnies are keeping company with someone.

NONNY-APPROVED
dListed
PerezHilton
CeleBitchy
Chelsea Handler
ONTD (Oh, No They Didn’t)
David Cronenberg – hey, we like him, too!

All credible, don’t you think?

NONNY NON-APPROVED
Ann Curry
Matt Lauer (remember Tristan Blewart)
David Letterman (for his first Rob interview in 2009)
Shauna Robinson
Wyck Godfrey
Lainey Whatsherface (we really could care less about her, either)
Ted Casablanca
Taryn Ryder with Celebuzz (formerly with E! Online)
MTV
Josh Horowitz
TheFABLife
VH-1
Kate Spencer
Wyck Godfrey
Catherine Hardwicke
Chris Weitz
David Spade
Bill Condon (his “I worship at the altar of KS” comment did them in)
Eddie Redmayne
Garrett Hedlund
Giovanni Agnelli
Melissa Leo
James Gandolfini
Jason Sudeikis
Joan Jett
Marcus Foster (videogate)
Michael Welch
Reese Witherspoon (she’s really nonnie-approved, but they hated when she said nice things about Kristen)
Ryan Reynolds
Tom Sturridge (he complimented K on her work in OTR)
William Hurt
- basically any other actor, director, producer or music / media professional who has every worked and paid a compliment to Kristen on her work ethic, abilities, creativity and dedication to craft.

Anna Wintour
Vogue US and Italia
Allure Magazine
Elle UK and US
Flaunt Magazine
Glamour US, UK, France
GQ UK
Interview Magazine
W Magazine
- any other magazine that starts with any letter between J and U

We’re certain, too, as we get closer and closer to On the Road’s release and Snow White and the Huntsman’s release and end of filming, that more complimentary words are to come.
Of course, according to the nonnies, all of these people are on the Summit dole, or are being paid by Kristen’s management group to “tow the line,” and say only nice things, because there is no way, NO WAY, according to the ninnies (who, as we know are expert on all things movie production), that Kristen could be viewed as anything other than the bitch-faced harpy they make her out to be. Funny, really, seeing as so many ninnies are bitch-faced harpies themselves. Guess it takes one to know one.

So, you see, BWAN friends, all it takes is a quick look at “The List,” and we’re pretty certain we can predict whose company you’d rather keep; and as always, who is the more sane and reasonable among them.

Until next time (and boy, do we have some doozies ahead).


P.S. We fancy ourselves little psychics sometimes. So let's "seer" what's in store for the up coming years.

We predict that a certain englishman and a sweet Cali girl will begin a love affair with Starbucks in 2013. We're off to buy stock in instagram.