N - LISTED

Last week, a BWAN colleague wrote an insightful and very reasoned explanation about the ninnies collective hatred towards Kristen, and their beliefs about Rob. The post took particular issue with the ninnies ongoing battle cry that Robert and Kristen are duping fans by being in a relationship that is for public relations purposes. The post exposed the flaws in this line of thinking, and put into question the ideals of an entire section of the fandom which holds such lofty esteem for a person who, by their accounts, is whoring himself out for the profit of a film studio, and then lying about it. Does this really sound like someone YOU could admire? We think not.

Today, we’re going to follow up on that line of thinking by talking about another phenomenon that often accompanies groups who proffer what we call “collective hate;” namely “if you’re not with us, you’re against us.” It’s a funny phenomenon that manages to wend its way into multiple social constructs we see daily: politics, religion, even social subjects such as homosexuality, etc.

And like the hatred itself, it is an EMOTIONAL REACTION to a rational issue.

The premise is basic: Either you agree with us (and our line of thinking), or you, too, become the object of our derision and hatred and are lumped into the category of “enemy.”

So how does this compute in the world of nonsten? Quite easily.

Every time someone in the public eye makes a positive comment about Kristen, that person is chided for doing such. It doesn’t matter if it is a film director, producer, co-star, friend, other actor or admirer, or even member of the media. Ninnies always find an excuse to lump these people into a singular category and then make disparaging comments about them simply because what those people have to say fails to fall in with the ninnie line of thinking.

You see, Kristen haters can’t stand it when ANYONE says something nice about THAT GIRL, or SWSNBN,* or “Spew,” as she’s known in the bleak chasm of ninnidom.  Heaven forbid ANYONE praise her work ethic, or abilities, or talk about how sweet (but shy) she is. Because when they do, they become automatic fodder for the Kristen-obsessed. And let’s face it folks, whoever feels the need to set up and/or contribute to a web community, or set up a twitter account, where the bulk of the content is focused on dispensing hatred onto a now-21 year-old young woman (they started when she was 19), IS OBSESSED. WITH. HER. Yes, even hatred is an obsession.

So, like any extremist group (and yes, ninnies are what we call extreme), they’ve created a list of sorts, made of up people whom they cannot find credible because of their track record of saying nice things about Kristen.  We here at BWAN call this the “n-list.”

And based upon the number of people who have said nice things about Kristen over the years, we can assure you the list is a long one. Almost as long as the list of epithets used to describe n-list members:

 “They’re a sell-out” they scream. “They were paid to say that.” “They’re just a fame whore.” “No way he/she really thinks that about Kristen. They’re’ just saying that for PR.” Get the picture?

The victims are many and varied.

From Twilight producer Wyck Godfrey (“He’s just trying to sell his film!”) to Vogue Editor Anna Wintour (“She was paid to put Kristen in her magazine. She has no taste!”), to film critic Roger Ebert (“He’s an idiot. He doesn’t know what he’s talking about. How can he say that?”), the list looks like some mutant alien weed that just keeps growing out of the earth at an immeasurable rate.

The ninnies’ latest victims were Kristen’s Twilight co-star Elizabeth Reaser and the 2011 MTV Movie Awards host Jason Sudeikis, who recently filmed an Awards’ promo piece with Kristen.

Elizabeth (Esme, if you haven’t figured that out by now) drew the ninny ire for simply answering a media question (something actors do ALL THE TIME) about the highly-anticipated Breaking Dawn wedding scene. During the interview, Elizabeth talked about how nervous and emotional both Kristen and Rob were in filming that scene. No big deal, right? Think again.
Ninnies were quick to attack Elizabeth, claiming her comments were just pushing the Summit-sponsored pro-Robsten agenda. “OMG, SHE’S PUSHING R’STEN!!! WHAT A FAMEWHORE!!!! HOW DARE SHE ANSWER THAT QUESTION!!”  

Really? A fame whore? For talking about a pivotal scene in a movie where likely any actor in that similar situation would also be nervous and emotional?
Color us rational, but we really don’t see what the issue is. Elizabeth is a fellow Twi actor who happened to be a part of the wedding scene in question, and who was asked simply to relay her experience during filming. (Here’s where we must interject that any mention of the “wedding” or “honeymoon” scenes drive the ninnies into a head-spinning frenzy that rivals Linda Blair in the Exorcism, complete with pea soup vomit. But we digress.)

She is NOT being a fame whore by recounting her experience, she is NOT selling out by saying the two leads were “emotional and nervous” during filming. She was simply relating her own experience to a question she was asked. End of.
But, for that infraction, she gets a place on the n-list.

Another recent addition is Jason Sudeikis, host of the 2011 MTV Movie Awards. At some point prior to the MTV Awards (where Robert, Kristen and Robert and Kristen swept their respective categories for which they were nominated), Kristen filmed a promotional clip for the awards show with Jason.  Based on the timing, one can presume it was filmed during Kristen’s stay in New York City after the Met Gala. You remember, don’t you? The extended stay for the purpose of arranging PR-pap shots of herself and Bear? Thought so.

In a follow-up interview about the upcoming show, Jason mentioned Kristen, and *collective monumental gasp* said something nice about her. Duh. Duh. Duh. Cue scary music.

In the interview, MTV reporter Josh Horowitz asked Jason who he enjoyed working with most during the promotional shoots. Jason deigned to say he “really liked” Kristen Stewart, that she was “really quiet and had a cool dog.” OMG! Dog? NO!!!!! He couldn’t have mentioned the DOG!!! What, you mean *whispers* Bear? NOOOOOOO!!!!!  

And to think, the rapture has come and gone.

Jason DIDN’T call Bear by name of course, but given the circumstances, yeah, you get the picture.
Add him to the list.

Someone a few weeks ago tweeted out what could very well be a near-complete list of people who have found their way into the ninny Hall of Hate for doing nothing more than saying nice things about a girl they’ve had the chance to meet and work with (something none of the ninnies can claim). To say it was lengthy is like saying ninnies were spawned by a mob of Orcs (our apologies to JRR Tolkien.)

We won’t repeat the entire list here (Jodie Foster, Melissa Leo, James Gandolfini, Joan Jett, William Hurt, Ryan Reynolds, Reese Witherspoon, Garrett Hedlund, etc.), but you get the idea. Of course, the ninnies all claim these people are just paid to say nice things about Kristen, that it’s all for PR, that none of them, NOT A ONE, could ever, truly, genuinely like the girl. “It’s impossible! We declare it thus,” they shout.

List or no, we’ll let you decide who’s more credible and worthy to judge Kristen – people who have actually experienced her in person and know her well? Or, a bunch of shrieking Orc-born ninnies.