Onu-rompere il mio cuore

Dear Roberto,

I hope it’s okay that I still call you that, because you are you know, my dear Robert. My heart.

Words just cannot express how sorrowful I am that you are continuing to ignore me after all of this time. I thought that after my last letter to you in February we would be able to reconnect, that you would find time to be with me and we could pick up where we left off.

It has been three years, Robert. Three years of waiting patiently and quietly in the wings, waiting for you to finish your contractual obligations with THAT GIRL, three years of yearning to walk hand-in-hand with you as your loving and supportive girlfriend on the red carpet. THREE years of knowing you were out there just waiting for the opportunity to break from your world and come to me in my beloved Italia. (p.s. I know last time I said four years and I know I was living in L.A...or was it London... but time and location doesn’t matter when one is in love. In my heart, I have loved you forever.)

I have tried, in vain, to contact you, but again my letters and texts and emails go unanswered. Instead, I see you out, in California, at a party for one of her friends at HER home in Malibu, with HER arms wrapped around your shoulders. And a party you flew directly from Europe to attend. How am I to compete with that when I was so near and you couldn’t even bother to drop into Italia to say hello?

Then there are photos of you out – at one of your friends’ concerts – friends I have yet to meet, Roberto. When, when will you introduce me to the Brit Pack? I am one of them, too. Their music as well touches my soul, unlike hers, which is untouchable.

I then had to endure photos of you on the beach, again near HER house, whilst you take lessons in paddle boarding (paddle boarding? What does an English gentleman such as yourself want with paddleboarding. This is obviously a symptom of her ill influence on you).

And this past week, whilst she was in England to promote HER movie, there you are. You are photographed near the castle where the promotion is taking place. You are photographed near her on the way to your birthday party. A party to which I was not invited.

And why is that, Roberto? After all of this time, all of my patience and devotion I have given for you. I have given up so much of my life to dedicate to you and what you said was your love for me. You betrayed that, Roberto. You made my life hell by ignoring me and continuing to be with THAT GIRL – even during those times when the studio said you didn’t have to be. You were still there, with her. I simply do not understand.

And during her promotion, when she spoke of you, and your dog, and her special birthday gifts – that should have been me. I should be the one waking up and “finding” a special necklace you’ve hidden away for me. I should be the one to call “Bear” my “baby.” I should be the one who gets to share special moments with you in Cannes.

I truly thought after friends of mine tipped off that gossip columnist who let our story out to the public that you could finally see the light, and you would once again find your way to my arms. I am sadly disappointed that this is not the case.

So here I am, writing another letter, this time my heart filled with sadness and despair.

I don’t know what to do anymore, Roberto. My heart, it aches for you. It is tender, it is love and I fear that I shall never have that love reciprocated. After three years of tenderness and of longing, this is how I am treated.

I fear maybe that some of the fans of THAT GIRL are right in that you really are a bad boyfriend. But you are NOT a bad boyfriend to HER (if that is well and what you truly are), but instead you are a bad boyfriend to me.

I believe this will be my last letter to you, unless you can change and prove your love to me. My heart, she can no longer take the pain of patience, and of waiting. It has been too long.

I don’t know what I will do except wait and hope one day you will see the light, and you can come to me and we can be reunited once again.

Until then, my heart is yours.

Your….